Respect Versus Abuse

 

If a person is trying to show you respect by being mean to you on purpose.  They feel frustrated that I have not respected things like how they don't like talking on the phone or how they want to be communicated to etc.  The person feels that till I don't show them respect they won't give me that respect.  I feel that they are not understanding my friendship, etc.  I feel it is coming to the point for being abusive and don't know what to do.  Any tips? Signed, Abusive.
 

Dear Abusive, The first thing that you should understand is that abuse is not right under any circumstance.  Meanness and abuse do not equal friendship.  They equal danger.  You have an obligation to yourself to get out of the situation immediately.  If you need help, contact the local abuse hotline, the police, social services, a pastor, or a trusted family member.  Get out of the abusive situation.

The second thing you should consider is that the best way to gain respect is to first respect yourself.  Please read how do I get people to respect me.  Take action to work on your self-esteem and self-respect.